What Have You Done For Others?

Your best experiences will be what you did for others not what others did for you

In some marriages it seems like a constant tally is taken to makes sure that one marriage partner has not done more for the other then they have received from the other. This whole notion of keeping score is turned upside down by the words of this woman written to a newspaper about someone's complaint of a wife "waiting on" her husband. She described herself in this way:

"A young couple got married in 1937. Mike worked the third shift for the railroad. He would come in at 7 a.m. to do odd jobs around the house, fix the old car, do everything but go to bed. Finally, at about 4 p.m. he'd crawl into the sack, and then it took an atomic bomb to wake him u so he could go to work. Rosie would plead, "Honey, give me your feet, I'll put your socks on for you." "By now it was 1947 and four children later. Rosie never told anyone how many times she had put on Mike's socks. The number came to about 15,000. Ann, that wife was me. I will soon be 75. Mike has been dead for 10 years. I would give anything if I could put on his socks just one more time."  Rosie (Ann Landers, June 1991)

A wonderful book read by millions is, "How to Make Friends and Influence People". Referring more to the title than the content of this excellent book, it may be better to think: "How to be a Friend and Serve Others". The way our society is organized requires the service of others in maintaining automobiles,typing our reports, fixing our appliances, and everything else. We tend to seek service from others and find that the successful person is the one who is able to have others do as much as possible in the way of service for him or her. 
Service, however, can be seen as something one can desire to do, and one becomes a better person through the performance of service. Thus, giving service to others is to be sought. It is more important to serve others than finding ways to have other serve us through obligation or repayment. If you visit with an old person and they reflect on what were their best years, their best experiences, you will hear not a description of what others did for them but an account of what they did for others.