Let Your Conscience Be Your Guide

 An appeal to conscience is found in all cultures in all times.

An artist can draw a picture of the conscinece sitting on a woman's shoulder, and whispering in her ear. This is a humorous visulization, but, let us hope that it doesn't trivialize this important resource for aquiring truth and knowledge. Maybe we should worry about the impact of the following conversation:

The postmodernist skeptic: So, you claim to be my conscience. Actuyally, you are nothing more than just an emotional reaction mixed with teh things taught while growing up: nothing more. 

The conscience: Sorry, but let me help you understand that in all these conversations we are having, you are not just talking to yourself. 

The postmodernist: Okay, so you exsist, but why do some people have you and some people don't? 

The conscience: I'm there for all. I am with people, however, there is no snse in sticking around if a person won't listen to me. I even leave when a person listens, but consistently choooses to act contrary to what I tell them. Yes, I can see why you would falsely conclude that some poeple don't have a conscience. 

The postmodernist: How convenient for you. You disappear when things don't go your way. 

The conscience: You don't understand my motives. I want to be with each and every person. My motivation is to stay and not leave. I'm always available, but each person can choose to tune me out. Furthermore, once a person freely chooses to act contrary to what I say, they do not want me to be with them. 

The postmodernist: Interesting; just what I thought. Freedom is more powerful than conscience. 

Conscience: Yes, but freedom needs conscience more than conscince needs freedom. 

At a later point in time, we will discuss about living free and truthful. You may be surprised to learn that living according to your conscience is the only way to truly live free. But, before discussing in more depth it is well known that people through all times and in all place report that they are able to be informed by their conscience.  People who recieve this type of guidance most often place it above all other forms knowledge. Some are so trusting and so dedicated to this knowledge, coming from their conscience, that they will forfiet their life rather than violate their conscience. It is rooted in the deepest feelings as well as intellect. 

  As mentioned, the problem with this kind of knowledge is that it does not give the same answers to all people. Everyone seems to have their own conscience and sometimes listening to one's conscience may cause  Person A to flee and Person B to fight.  Is there a way to reconcile these opposite responses both based on the conscience? 
 If you are to trust your own conscience it would be well to understand these contradicitons between what conscience tells different people. Can this problem be resolved? 

A most straightforward answer is that what is absolutely right for Person A might be absolutely wrong for Person B, based on the differences in the persons, the time, and the circumstances. This is due to context and is not to be confused with relativism. This does not mean that there is no absolute truth and that all is relative to each person's conscience. It means that each person recieves an assurity that they are acting according tot heir conscience, even though the answer may not be the same as that recieved by someone else. This, indeed, is a complex question. But, to live free you must come to terms with your own conscience, and decide to trust your conscience. Put conscience in the very center of your relationship, your family, especially your marriage, but before doing this, more needs to be said about following your conscince. 
 We will discuss this in next weeks' post.           

  

Subjective and Objective Truths

"Life's meanings come from subjective as well as objective truths."

Professor Jensen encountered this kinid of knowledge when studying hte easrly existentialists, Martin Heidigger (1889-1976) and Soren Kierkegaard (1813-1885) in a seminar with graduate students. 
 These early existentialists, who are known as deep thinkers, talk in complicated ways about the most simplest things. These two existentialsists have helped scholars realize that there is a different way to view the world and to gain knowledge. There is a subjective type of knowing that is more fundamental, than a scientific analysis of what Kierkegaard calls objective truth. 
 This experimental type of know is for Heidigger, the most important way to find meaning in both material objects and ourselves. 
So, for students who want, need and maybe demand an academic base for this, we will use this insight from existential philosophy. 
Existentialism is concerned with both the nature of knowing and also the nature of being a person. 

Now, also consider what is probably the most profound statement ever made by a philosopher. It was set forth as the foundation of his work by the father of philosophy, Rene Descartes (1596-1640). 
He was searching for the one truth about which a person can be absolutely certain. His conclusion was that he knew for certain, that he existed. In other words, one can only be certain of one's own existence. Thus his famous statement, "I think therefore I am".  Even a child knows this to be true. First we accept that we exist, and then we explore what we become. 
"Know thyself", "To thine own self be true", "Just be yourself", are a sampling of advice you have undoubtedly heard. Why must you consciously work to accomplish the obvious? Who else could you be, and aren't you always aware of just who you are. 
Who else would you know you better than yourself? For are you not with yourself 24 hours each day and everyday? Maybe it is easier to understand the popularity og these sayings if you remember the popular phrase, "The unexamined life is not worth living!" 

 The conclusion to all this is that to be the best possible marriage partner, friend, person you can be, you must know "What are we?" Then, use the most sensible and appropriate methods to understand the illusive and hard to observe spirit of your partner. Omitted is an even more important way to respond to the spirit of the one you love.          

Experimental Learning

At one point in time, Professor Jensen was helping one of his students find a journal were they could submit research. He was surprised to find one called, "The Journal Of Experimental Education". After he published the article, he realized that this kind of learning is the basis of what we refer to as common sense. It is important to call this learning to your attention. It should not be overlooked. 
  
Same daughter: Mom, how much help were those books you read and the classes? 

Same mother: Of course they helped but, experience or learning from day to day has proven to be the most valuable kind of learning.
Do you think there were no good parents or marriage partners before there were classes and books on understanding each other? 

Daughter: But, is this kind of learning reliable and valid? 

Mother: Well, thousands each day make life and death decisions based on this kind of knowledge ans do so with equal or more confidence than decisions based on academic information. I use this knowledge first and even doubt other information if it is not in harmony or consistent with what I know from my years of experience. 

Daughter: Do you think that what you said is a little self aggrandizing? 

Mother: Now that you mention it, yes, it sounds that way. Sorry, but wasn't it you who told me that Dad thought I understood him best? I never found your dad in anything I read!

There is a kind of knowledge which comes from experimental living. This is the living we do from infancy to death. We live and interact with people. We learn from meeting them and accepting them in a way which they become part of our experiential world.
  Experiential refers to the way that we interpret everyday objects. events, and people as they appear and as they present themselves to us. This is definitely informational learning. Perhaps it is the most important type of learning that brings about an understanding of others and our self. 
 In addition tot he direct experiential living we have, one on one with the objects of the world and other people there are interactions with the knowledge and truth statements that exists in our culture. Here we find information by reading literature,listening to wise people, reflecting and introspecting on our daily observations, paying attention to our traditions, recalling and observing interactions of people with each other, reading, religious practices and instruction, and all the other ways we learn in our jobs, schools, churches, and private lives. 
These interactions and learning gradually accumulate to tell us much about who we are and the people we live with. We come to know individuals directly, but we also acquire certain abstractions and concepts about people in general. Some of us are much better attuned, interested, and intellectually capable of benefiting from this kind of learning, and usually such people share what they have learned. Thus we learn from one another and from our own experiences a type of truth and knowledge which is unequaled and irreplaceable for optimal understanding in your relationships.  
 

Loving Service

As I have mentioned in prior writings, we have established that we are not static electricity randomly "floating" through space and time. We all have a soul, or a spirit and we all have individual value with more substance than just being placed here. Agreeing with this or knowing this can further help us understand each other and our spouses or loved ones in greater depth. In keeping with this topic and while reading the following, keep that in mind.

Here is a story that has taken many times, many places, in different languages and cultures. The issues, surroundings of the individuals might change, but the message will remain the same.

Daughter: Dad said you understand him better than anyone in his life. How do you do it? In fact, you understand me better than anyone else. Mom, what is your secret? Tell me how you do it.

Mother: Well first, you should realize that there are many ways and I use them all. But, there is one way that is a sure thing. By far it is the best way.

Daughter: Well, tell me, but first, let me get a pen. I want to write it all down.

Mother: A pen isn't necessary, in fact it is so simple and basic, but many people don't think about it. If you could sum up understanding someone into one word, it would be "Service". In one sentence, I would say, "Begin each day with your spouse with loving service".

Daughter: Do you have plans and goals when you do this?

Mother: Oh, no, nothing like that. It is almost like happiness. If you seek happiness, it will elude you. However, if you live right, happiness will find you. So it is with loving service. When you serve another person you just come to know that person in a way that can not be equaled.

Daughter: Maybe that is why so many wives understand their husbands better more than they are understood by their husbands.

Mother: (chuckle) That is a humorous way of looking at it. But the principle also works with for the men whom I have met. When they care, help, and see their lives as being the the service of their families, they become men with more understanding. You naturally come to understand those whom you serve.
 
When students are asked, "Who knows you best?", they do not say, "My Therapist." Usually they say, "My mom", and secondly they say, "My dad". The mother and the father are examples of someone who has served them, loved them, or has shared their life with them first. They are not the people who are particularly astute in knowing laws and abstractions about human behavior. They are people who have lived, worked, loved, and shared a world together. How artificial is it to try to understand someone else in an office. To best understand another person, you need to do things together like: eat, work on a job, share stories, take care of one another when sick, and live with them in a loving, serving and unselfish way. Does this not sound like marriage? Does this not tell you about another way to truly understand people, especially those who you love the most? This conclusion is just the opposite of what we usually think is the way to precede with helping and understanding.

Reasoning

This post was written by Professor Jensen and revised and posted by Dena Jensen
  

It is good to be called rational, but don't be satisfied with the compliment. 
The following story will help yeild some light and clarification about the power and limits of reasoning. 

Bright Student: I just detest the debates I have with you. Through your cleverness your logic make up, seem down, black turns to white, and good becomes bad. 

Professor: Well, don't take is seriously. It is a game and a good game with rules. I just know how to play it better than you. 

Bright Student: But, It isnt a game for me. I want to use my mind to find truth. I want to think clearly. I want to use logic to find truth and prove it to others. 

Professor: Well, you might think you are proving something to another if you find them a little less intelligent. Of course, don't plan on really disovering truth with your logic. 

Bright Student: Why? 

Professor: Well, because for thousands of years the best minds have tried and failed You are not doing yourself a favor if you use reason alone. Don't rely on reason by itsself to find the final answers to the big questions. 

Bright Student: So? 

Professor: Be happy. Be happy you have a good mind, that  you can use your thinking skills so well, that you can use your gifts to enhance and improve you personal life. But, remember to be humble. Humility is the gift that is limited in what it can give you and more limited in convincing others. 

To understand what this professor is trying to convey, it is important to think logically. It is useful to consider two types of reasoning. The first is scientific, which has for it's basis sensory data. The other kind of reasoning has for its foundation fundamental propositions or premises that are believed to be infallible. Some call them different things, we can call them assumptions. In this case, we begin with these acceptable premises, or propositions, then proceed with mental calculations which supposedly guide us to knowledge and truth. It must be obvious to you that the conclusions reached through the most careful and astute reasoning can be no better than the propositions upon which they rest.
   In the case of scientific reasoning, the conclusions will be wrong if the sensory data is incorrect to start with. As with the other kind of reasoning, the conclusions will be false if the fundamental permse or preposition was in error. For example, if you begin your reasoning with a fundamental belief that people are basically good or people are basically bad, the conclusions reached will be different. Reasoning is a tool used to supplement and expand what may or may not be true beginnings. Furthermoreit can be easily shown that the mental calculations used in reasoning can lead to inaccurate conclusions through falty reasoning. Problems in reasoning are easily demonstrated in introductory courses in logic. 
 Now, with this realization that there are problems inherent in both sensory and rational approaches to knowledge, you will still, like most people, use and trust each. So, when you believe that you are a practical person you simply mean that you are capable of employing your senses and reasoning to come to better conclusions. So, what if you use both reasoning and sensory observations together, at the same time? 
This is scientific reasoning. 
For a discussion on Scientific Reasoning, please click here.  

  

Can Science "Know All"?

The modern world is built upon science that cannot know all. 
 The difficulty is that science has proven itself to be the most powerful method of finding truth ever conceived, and this may lead to some to turn their backs on all the other methods.This can put you in a disadvantage when it comes to understand people. 

Think for a bit of a (possible) conversation between a Psychologist Professor and a Parent. 

Professor: You would like to know which Parenting Theory is best?

Parent: Yes, but not just which one is best, but true. Which theory has the most scientific proof? 

Professor: Actually, you are asking at least three questions: 
What is best? 
What is true?
What is scientific? 
I think you will have an answer to all three when you consider that no credible, informed and honest scientist will claim that his methods can adequately study what cannot be observed or measured. 
  Thus, when you expressed a belief that each person has a spirit and that spirit has something to do with directing, then science will not be able to adequately nor fully explain what you need to know. 

Parent: So are you saying that I can not turn to science for my answers to my parenting questions? 

Professor: Not quite. Sure, you can turn to science for such answers; many will be very good. But don't expect to find a scientific theory that is adequate to explain, predict, or completely inform you with all you want to or need to know about parenting. 

Parent: So, where do I turn?

Professor: Turn to science for important information about regularities in behavior, growth patterns, correlations between behaviors and environment. Science provides many good insights about such matters. But now knowing this, also realize that in psychology alone there are hundreds of theories. It would be foolish to select one theory on the basis that it is scientifically true. A genuine scientist will not pretend that he can adequately study the most important aspect of a person, which is that of the will, soul or spirit or . whatever you call it 

Again, the greatest and most dramatic illustration of truth finding through the sensory, is the use of sensory of information and reasoning through science. 
Everyone must be impressed with the undeniable achievements of science in the physical world. Scientific disciplines are staffed with men who have proven themselves exceptional in using the scientific method to uncover truth and knowledge. 
 Therefore, without dispute, science is the foundation for truth and knowledge in our technically based society. However, you should be aware honest scientists will tell you directly that they cannot, and in fact do not, want to use this method to tell you about things that are not based on empirical observation. If you believe that people are more a material body, then you must turn to other methods for a complete and understanding of the relationships and people around you.  
  

You Must Know More Than You Can Observe

Post Written By Professor Jensen and Dena Jensen

Here is a good quote about knowledge, "To be successful with people you must first know more than you can observe"

Here we have a fictitious Father, who was self employed, self made Businessman. He was very serious and never had time for nonsense. He was impatient with his cousin, whose employment was an avid magician. Let us get a glimpse of  conversation they are having about what can be trusted. Let's see how the remarks ended: 

Businessman: It is truly amazing that you can fool my sense like that. Making things appear and disappear like that. 

Magician: Actually such illusions can and do happen all the time. I just stage things to fool the senses of sight, touch and hearing in order to impress. I don't use my knowledge to deceive.

Businessman: But, I could be deceived so easily. I see or should I say, I know that now. 

Magician: But, if you are aware of the possibility of your senses fooling you, you can then be on guard not to be fooled but still trust your senses because you must use them daily to wisely deal with the world we live in. 

Businessman: Yes, but my most important problems are about my family. I want certainty. I want what I see and hear to be true. Can I also be deceived there?

Magician: Of course. In fact, you have less assurance that what you se and hear when observing people is true. People are much more difficult to observe than physical sight and sounds! Beware! 

Businessman: So, what then?

Magician: To be successful with your family you must see and hear more than what you observe. 

Rarely you are warned about your senses deceiving you. 
 Instead you hear things like, "I have to see it to believe it", "I'd have to hear that from the source." These two common phrases are associated with the belief that the most certain knowledge is what we can see or hear. 
However, anyone that is acquainted with psychology or philosophy in the early part of the 20th Century knows that what comes to the eyes or ears is not what exists in nature. All sensory input is altered, changed and interpreted by the mind. The popularity and skill of the magician is based on the fact that our senses do not give us an exact certain representation of the physical world. 
 Bertand Russell (1872-1970), philosopher of science, explains that the color, texture and shape of a table may be very different from what we actually receive through the senses and yet we always know it to be the same table. 
 We usually admire the man that says, "Show me or prove it to me first." Proving something, or "proving it" means to provide sensory evidence that something is there.  And yet, there are many times in our existence where we must act with out this kind of knowledge to survive and prosper. We need to be aware that our hard to observe feelings are a part of reality. Unobservables do guide us to appropriate actions with our marriage partners, especially our feelings and emotions, which are very important in a marriage. 
A high level of observable objectivity is of great value, however, it alone cannot answer life's questions about another spirit, feelings and emotions. 
Sometimes we must make subjective judgements in the absence of sensory data. It is necessary to add reasoning, to go beyond what we observe.
 

Use Many Ways To Find Truth And Knowledge

This post is a collaboration by Professor Larry Jensen and Dena Jensen

I worry about a very limiting belief. It is that there is only one source of knowledge. As many of us already know, the standard for truth in modern society is science. Science defines truth as a standard in courts of law, legislation, public and private debates, and just about everything else. When we want to understand the material or natural world, we must use this unequaled method. We need science. We loves science. But, must  we sometimes look beyond science for other source of truth and knowledge? 

We are then faced with these questions: 

• How much do I trust my senses?
• How much do I trust my reasoning?
• How much do I trust science? 
• How much do I trust my consequences?
• How much do I trust my general abstractions?
• How much do I trust common sense?

Do you or have you spent much time thinking about how you have come to believe what you believe? Much of the general populous do not and that is common to not think about where you came with your knowledge and why you think and believe what you believe. Sometimes we take for granted that what we believe is correct, or else we would not believe it in the first place. 
 Please ask yourself to consider this; "How much do I trust the different paths to knowledge?" This question must weigh in your knowledge and must be considered before accepting what you know to be truth. 

We propose to over the next couple of weeks find an opportunity to consider how you trust the different ways you come to know things. 

 

Being A Better Father

This post was Written by Dena Jensen

I have had writer's block these last few weeks, and I apologize for that. I want to be better at posting more, and I need to be better at posting on here more. I am growing and learning. 

Anyway, I have been thinking about this topic for sometime now. This is in no way pointing fingers. I have happened to want to talk right now specifically to you men. 

  In this world and in American Society, we have a big problem with over crowded Prisons and jails, we have a very pandemic problem with crimes and if you were to dig deep into the problems, you will find more than 60% of these people were raised in a home with out their fathers ever being in their life. 

This, we can conclude, is scary. It is scary because we as adults have a responsibility to our future and we have a responsibility to our children in particular. With this said, I would like to write 10 Ways to Be A Better Father the order of which is not in any in particular. .

Be A Good Example 

All children admire their dads. When we are little in the school yard, we brag about whose father is taller, stronger bigger, smarter, etc etc etc. I remember once a boy said to me,"My dad can beat up your dad". I was offended. Why would anyone want to beat up my dad? I said, "My dad has written more books than your dad"

 Which was probably true, and to this day I do not know what his dad does, but, that to me was a more realistic argument. 

Fathers need to be in their children's lives and at an early age, and a good example to their children. For you Fathers that do not get to see your children more than what court allows, you need to make the most of that. And never do anything that will make your child question your integrity later. Kids deserve a good example in their life and the best examples are their parents.

Be Humble

Love is not boastful. Sometimes parents will make mistakes now and then, we are only human. But, it is OK and even healthy for children to see that when an adult makes a mistake, they humble themselves and apologize. It is OK to apologize to a child now and then. It shows that you are willing to accept that you might be wrong now and then and that you will accept them if they make mistakes. Sometimes that is all it takes for a child. We can learn from ourselves and learn from our children when we have a bit of humility. 

Be Involved

If you are a married father with your children in your home, this is optimum. But, sometimes this can not happen and moms and dads are more commonly divorced. Whatever the home situation is, you need to be involved in your child's life. Going to their games, talking to their teachers, being home for dinner, planning family activities with your children are just somethings you can do to be in your children's life. Other things such as helping your children with homework, teaching them how to drive, taking them on an errand, fixing the house or cars, cleaning the kitchen with your child after a meal, making a meal for the family, or simply going on a walk with your child are just other simple ways to get involved in your child's life. sometimes this will mean having to download "Skype" to video chat with them. Hey, Dad, that is better than no communication.  They are wanting you to reach out to them. You are the parent, you need to be the one to do it. 

Keep Family Ties/ Love Your Own Parents

The best way for your child to know about his/herself and you is for you to have a healthy good family relation with you and your own family. Grandparents in the USA actually do not have parental rights to their grand children so in a divorce if the divorce is very bitter, the grandparents are caught in a pretty sad battle and usually the losing side and rarely seeing the grand-kids. On the rare occasion there are families that are not a good influence, and the grandparents are not a good example in the children's life, of course, we say there needs to be an emancipation of the family. In the most part, families are not bad. Keep in contact and good relations with those family members that are good and healthy and provide a healthy relationship with your children. 

Be Gentle

I have noticed that it is usually the father in the home that is more of the disciplinary and the mother is the one saying "Wait til your father gets home"! And that is supposed to be a threat to the child to straighten up and do what they are told or dad will come home and handle them. I do not think this is fair and sometimes it works. But, dad's when in reality do you want to come home after a hard day's work and discipline the kids? Dads need to learn to hand over the discipline to the mom and the dad's need to be more like the mom and have the fun time with the kids. I am not saying children should not have discipline, but use a balance. And never ever physical discipline. My dad was good with using weed pulling and yard work as a discipline. Mom would just send us to our room, as a time out. However, I loved being in my room more than being out of it o dad developed the pulling weeds idea for me. For every minute I was snarky to my parents, I got 5 minute of weed pulling. It added up fast as a teen. But, It was a good way to get out some upset emotions I had, and good exercise and a good way to get the yard clean. However, mom and dad were very gentle with me and still are. Kids learn better with someone guiding them, not hitting them or belittling them. 

Be Honest

Children need honesty. Sometimes there needs to be private and quiet discussions that are age appropriate. If your child is an adult, honesty, but discretion.   I happened to see a friend of a friend's wall on Facebook on Mother's Day. I was astonished and yet grateful. I was astonished on what this mother had on her wall, and grateful she was not my friend on Facebook nor in person. Her whole life was right there on Facebook for the world to see. She was fighting with her husband and both herself and husband were posting everything publicly. Honesty is so important however, sometimes, even when you are fighting with your wife and very angry, go behind a closed door and quietly work it out together, and not using any Social Network as a means of handling the situation. Your kids will thank you in the long run. 

Be Wise

 Be wise with your money and time you spend with your children. Be wise with your friendships and how you handle life's situations. Your children watch you and follow your footsteps. They admire you and they want to be like you. Be wise with how you speak of others and how you conduct your life.

Spend Time

My dad would take me on "Father Daughter Dances" and "Daddy Dates" when I was 10, and all the way through my teen age years. We would go on family rides in the canyon, fishing, walks, vacations, spend family time together. Once a week, in fact, every Monday Night we had in our home "Family Home Evening". This is when mom and dad or one of us kids would pick a topic that we would talk about. Honesty, Integrity, The Meaning Of Christmas, The True Meaning of Easter, Faith, Value of Prayer... It was one hour of us learning a new Virtue. After wards, mom would go in the kitchen and make a dessert while we would have "Family Council"  This is when we would all talk about the week, what we were planning for the next month as far as car usage, family rules we needed to go over, if there were any announcements to make, they were made then, ideas for other family activities would be planned then. We talked and socialized during Dinner too. Every night dad would get home if he did not have an evening class and we would have dinner at 6:00 pm every night. That was a time for  us to talk about our day. Those things will always be in my heart and mind. Especially Family Home Evening. 

Give Freedom

  

Children want discipline but they also want  independence. Once your child gradually grows and develops, you will see ways in which that child will need their freedom. This is natural and a part of growing and becoming their own individual human. It is natural for a parent to not want a child to suffer the same way they did. It is natural for a parent to say things such as, "Don't make the same mistakes I did!" I was involved with a discussion once where a mother whose daughter is so very talented with music and vocal skills. I mean... I am in awe. The daughter wants to go to a University where she can grow musically but her mother is insistent she follow another path. Not allowing this girl the freedom to pursue the dream of going to a Music University will just lead for resentment. Of course there is the fear that she may not get in. Which is not her mother's fear. Her mother's fear is that she will not be happy and that she will have a life full of drugs because many musicians are on drugs. Her mom wants her to pursue something more "Academic". 

 Well, to this I say, the mother needs to give this young lady a little more independence. Parents need to realize that children have their own dreams and their own talents and abilities. 

Be Loving

Be kind and loving to everyone. Do not let your kids know you have a disdain for your ex-wife and her family. Be kind to your children and speak good words about people. Your children will trust you and love you more and feel more accepted by you if you are kind to others and say good things and stay positive about the world around you. Children need love, and you as a father are the perfect one to give them love. Sometimes it is hard to give a hug to a child. Start with patting them on the shoulder or back. Praise them when they do something good or something you like. Give them kind words of love when they are with you and always let them know you love them. I know many people who have sadly, ended their marriage in divorce. I have seen either side speak so badly of the other parent. This will damage the children and make the wounds of divorce even deeper. If parents are not divorced, then they should never ever speak badly about the other parent. There is never good that will come of this. Never speak harshly to your child either. Children need to hear good words from their dads. Hug your children. Tell them you love them, tell them how important they are in your life. You will be pleasant surprised the blessings that will be returned to you;and your children deserve to have the best of you. 

Well, this is my list. If you father's have anything else to contribute or if you have a good experience with your children you would like to share with us, please post it. 

To all the good healthy fathers out there that have been loving and good and kind to your children, good work! Keep up the good life you are giving your children! 

I hope you all continue to read my blog, and I will continue to write or have my dad write for more information on Growth and Change.

BELIEF FOUR: I CAN DIRECTLY KNOW WHAT IS TRUE AND GOOD

In an information age you can immediately Google all kinds of information about self-change and personal growth. The information comes from professionals, testimonials product users, science, and reasoned opinions, to mention just a few sources available. You know from years of experience that it is beneficial to consider many sources. But in today’s world scientific information is valued most. Here you can find information about how to better communicate, solve problems, conduct a self analysis, increase memory, standup for yourself, control anger, self -medicate, and etc.

But there is one extremely important tool or source of truth and knowledge that is more important than all those listed above. It is how to directly know about good and bad, right and wrong. It is a way of knowing that has been used for centuries and widely and highly regarded today. The source for this valuable ability is your conscience. It is a belief imbedded in the United States Constitution and in many other legal statutes worldwide. It is expressed with these words, “We hold these truths to be self-evident.” It is the belief that the common man can be trusted to directly know and discern what is true. 

Notice also that our whole social system requires citizens to act in good faith following their conscience. You know what a person means when they say, “My conscience would not let me do that”, or “I listened to what my conscience had to say.” It is used all the time. A nation cannot be governed by laws alone nor can an individual. We need to  rely our conscience to be a complete person.
Now what does this mean for your self-development and becoming a better person? I think you will agree that should you succeed in every possible dimension of self improvement and do follow your conscience you will be of little value to yourself or others. You have all met powerful, rich, bright, or persons with great charm who you do not respect or like because they seem to lack a conscience. All self development is for nothing if you fail in being a person who is guided by a conscience.

Fortunately, all can develop this ability. Essentially it begins by believing you have a conscience, then listening, and finally by gaining experience in following your conscience.  

 SELF-INSIGHT  QUESTIONS FOR PRACTICAL APPLICATIONS

1. Do I  value people more when  they have a strong conscience?

2. Do I frequently have a feeling that something, or someone within me is telling me to do or not to do something?

3. Just what is conscience? Is it an entity inside of a person or a source of truth that comes from outside a person or both?


4. How do I feel when I act contrary to my conscience?


5.  Are feelings of freedom and happiness tied to following my conscience?


6. What can I do to increase the voice and role of conscience in my life?





7. What is the most important thing I have learned from this lesson and discussion?